


Black Sheep

by Izzyaro (Isilarma)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Brotherly Bonding, Gen, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:28:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,242
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24427267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Isilarma/pseuds/Izzyaro
Summary: Heaven might be home and angels might be family, but neither have ever been perfect. Balthazar and Castiel struggle to find their place, but at least they have each other.
Relationships: Balthazar & Castiel (Supernatural)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 19





	Black Sheep

“Explain yourself.”

Balthazar summoned his most charming smile. “I was expanding my horizons.”

Anael’s Grace crackled, and Balthazar dropped his gaze. Frustration burned within him, but he forced it down and summoned some show of remorse. He was in enough trouble as it was. Anael’s overwhelming presence relaxed slightly, but Balthazar could feel her disapproval.

“You have been warned about this, Balthazar.”

Balthazar wanted to promise that it would never happen again, but he couldn’t lie to his superior and the words stuck in his throat. He continued to stare at the floor as Anael continued, “You were given a mission-”

“Which I completed,” Balthazar put in, but he shut up when Anael glared at him.

“You then wasted time and energy on a non-essential detour before returning to report.”

Balthazar bit down what he wanted to say. He had done his job. What did it matter that he had taken a moment to indulge himself before coming home? His wings bristled, and he had to take a moment to calm himself. Gabriel might have appreciated his attitude, but his Garrison Commander was another matter entirely.

Balthazar really missed Gabriel.

Balthazar wrenched his mind away from that thought. Gabriel was gone, and he was still in trouble. He looked up to meet Anael’s cool gaze.

“I apologise,” he said stiffly.

Anael studied him for a long minute. “You are restricted to barracks, effective immediately.”

Balthazar flinched, but Anael wasn’t finished, “Since you have energy to waste, perhaps you should spend time on the training fields.”

The snap of her Grace made it clear that it wasn’t a suggestion. Balthazar swallowed down his protests and bowed. “Yes, sir.”

He spread his wings, already plotting a course to the barracks, but a light brush against his feathers made him pause. He glanced back to find Anael watching him, and for the first time in what seemed like a long time there was something resembling compassion in her eyes.

“You’re a good soldier, Balthazar. You fulfil your duties well, and I trust you. Be content with that.”

For a second Balthazar could only stare at her. There was a whole universe out there, filled with more wonders than he could even begin to imagine, and he was supposed to be content with just doing his job?

But she didn’t understand and he could only nod.

“Yes, sir.”

Anael held his gaze a moment, then let him go with a cursory caress against his Grace. Balthazar bowed again and took wing.

Only once he was alone did Balthazar finally let his emotions out. His wings strained as he pushed himself to greater speeds, trying to make the most of his limited freedom. He shot through the air, indulging in a display of top speed acrobatics that would have earned him another lecture if Anael had been around, but he couldn’t bring himself to care.

Gabriel wouldn’t have minded. Gabriel would have joined him and given him tips and tricks and pushed him to ever more extreme manoeuvres. Gabriel would have encouraged him to make the most of every opportunity and to live his life to the full and to never settle for just being content.

But Gabriel was gone, and the other archangels didn’t give a damn, and all Balthazar could do was obey.

The training grounds were deserted but for a single familiar flare of Grace, and that was enough to lift Balthazar’s spirits. Castiel was running through drills with a speed and precision that belied his relative youth, and Balthazar angled himself to land next to him. His brother finished his exercise and cocked his head to one side.

“Balthazar. I didn’t expect to see you.”

“Yes, well I didn’t expect to be here,” said Balthazar. Castiel frowned, and he elaborated, “I’m grounded until further notice.”

Castiel’s frown deepened. “You visited the protoplanetary nebula.”

“I’d never seen one before,” said Balthazar defensively. “And it was on my way back. What was the harm in that?”

“It was unnecessary,” said Castiel. He sheathed his blade and gave Balthazar a disapproving look. “You were tasked to examine the anomaly and return.”

“I know,” Balthazar bit out. Castiel’s wings twitched, and Balthazar closed his eyes. “I’m sorry. I’ve had one lecture today, I don’t need another.”

Castiel nodded, but didn’t reply. Balthazar took a moment to steady himself, then continued more calmly, “I just don’t see the problem. It was interesting and I was curious. Is that so terrible?”

“No, just unnecessary,” Castiel repeated. “You need to focus on your duties.”

Balthazar scowled, but it wasn’t Castiel he was angry at. He stared up at the heavenly skies. “Don’t you ever think that there must be more to existence than just our duties?”

He hadn’t meant to give voice to the feeling, but it slipped out anyway. Thankfully the training ground was deserted, and he trusted Castiel, but the growing frown on his brother’s face made him regret speaking anyway.

“Never mind,” he muttered. “Forget it.”

He started to turn away, only for Castiel to stretch out a wing to brush over his. Castiel’s frown had shifted to concern. “I don’t understand. Is something wrong?”

Balthazar stared at him, and for a moment he wanted nothing more than to let all the frustrations he had bubble over, but then the moment passed and he looked away. Gabriel might have understood, but Castiel... “It doesn’t matter.”

Castiel continued to study him, but he finally nodded. “Very well.” He hesitated. “Do you wish to spar?”

Balthazar mustered a smile. “It’d be more interesting than running drills.” He unsheathed his blade, but when he turned to properly size up his brother he frowned. “Wait. What happened to you?”

Castiel tilted his head to one side. “I have been training.”

“For how long?”

Now that he was looking, the signs of stress in his brother’s Grace were obvious. Balthazar reached out to entangle their wings. “Castiel. What happened?”

Castiel met his gaze steadily. “I was informed that I still have a great deal to learn.”

Balthazar stared at him for a moment, then understanding sank in and he rubbed a hand over his face. “How many times age I told you not to listen to Uriel?”

“He is a good soldier-”

“That doesn’t mean he knows what he’s talking about,” Balthazar snapped. Castiel looked away and Balthazar stretched out wings and Grace to pull him into a hug. “You’re already an amazing warrior, Castiel. Don’t kill yourself trying to please that fool.”

He could feel his brother’s confusion and hugged him tighter, sending all the love and support in his soul. Castiel was hard working, loyal, devoted... Everything an angel should be and everything Balthazar wasn’t, and it hurt that Castiel couldn’t see it.

Castiel returned the embrace without hesitation.

“He’s not a fool, Balthazar, and I can always improve my skills.” He drew back, but continued to radiate warmth and contentment. “Perhaps you should try it.”

Balthazar stared at him, then broke into a grin. “Castiel! Am I finally rubbing off on you.”

“I have no idea what you mean,” said Castiel, but his dancing Grace betrayed him. Balthazar laughed and retrieved his blade.

“All right then. Why don’t you show me just how much you’ve learned?”

Castiel’s Grace shone bright and brilliant as he raised his own blade in a salute, and Balthazar spread his wings. He might be grounded, but he had Castiel. For now, that was enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! First fic for this fandom, so any feedback would be appreciated.
> 
> Come and find me on tumblr for more fanfic-related stuff. https://izzyaro.tumblr.com/


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